In July, my aunt Hilde left her body. After suffering from a brief illness, she left us to be with the Lord forever. During her life, she carried a beautiful joy for many things: music and singing, delicious food, travel, writing and reading, fashion, and for her service as a nurse, service she fulfilled for nearly 50 years. She lived with a true “zest for life,” as my mother calls it; she loved celebrations and gatherings, and had so many amazing experiences during her lifetime.
I was sitting in the park thinking about her, as I looked upon the horizon, where the sun was setting in a gorgeous array of colors. I thought about how our souls are given this bodily vessel and how to have that experience is a blessing. We tend to lose our awareness that it is a gift to dwell in a body, even if that body has aches and pains or things we might wish to change.
There is so much going on in the world, both on a global level and in the nitty-gritty of our daily lives. It can be a challenge to find ways to manage the stress of it all and remember the light and resilience we carry within.
I’ve long known that mindfulness practice is a powerful way to promote calm and reduce the effects of stress, but I recently learned the fascinating and life-changing details of just how it can achieve this.
I had the wonderful opportunity to speak with Dr. Kirk Bingaman, Fordham University professor of mental health counseling and spiritual integration, at Trinity Church Wall Street about anxiety (both personal and collective) and how mindfulness practice can help us manage it by rewiring the brain over time – toward resilience, non-reactivity, steadiness, and positivity. We discussed mindfulness practice, neuroplasticity, and how we can access calm and peace in daily life. Dr. Bingaman gave a presentation on these topics before our chat.
Click the image below to view the event recording.
Tiffany Nicole Fletcher and Dr. Kirk Bingaman in conversation at Trinity Church Wall Street
Did you know that the innate orientation of our brains is anxiety and hypervigilance?
This ancient design served an evolutionary purpose, as a way to help our ancestors anticipate threats and survive in the face of mortal danger a long time ago. It has helped humans survive through the ages.
Most of us no longer face the threat of being killed by a tiger, yet we all still carry a brain that is constantly anticipating danger and pain. In his book, The Power of Neuroplasticity for Pastoral and Spiritual Care (which I highly recommend!), Dr. Bingaman shares about the ways that mindfulness practice can help us steer the brain toward the positive:
While in community recently, I had the eye-opening opportunity to witness many misconceptions about healing and the healing process. Sadly, many so-called healers even hold these beliefs, and perpetuate them to their clients and the broader community. I decided to share these misconceptions here and also share what I’ve learned to be true.
Misconception #1: “If you live with a disease, you are unhealthy. If you are physically “well,” you are healthy.
Health is more than the absence of disease. You might have heard this statement before, or seen it floating around the internet. It’s worth reflecting on. Health is more than just being free of disease in the physical body, and it’s not a one-time event that happens and lasts forever. Health is the sum of all the factors of our lives that intersect and form our well-being. How are your relationships? Do you feel held in community? Are you fulfilled and satisfied with how you spend your days? Are your material needs being met? How are you treated in the broader society in which you live? Do you reside in a safe and supportive environment? Do you live in a state of chronic stress? What is your relationship to your past; are you living in unforgiveness or bitterness?
Lately I’ve been thinking about emergence and transition, about what it’s like to move out of periods of darkness or change and come into new ways of being, living, and even loving. I’ve been thinking about the grief involved in that, about how necessary grief is as a process, how it eventually leaves a clearing…and about how often we experience a grief process but don’t recognize it as that.
The process is different when we’re able to call it what it is. Grief likes to be welcomed into the room, given a proper seat.
One of the most important things you can do right now is to locate your true Source and keep drinking from that well. In “normal” (non-pandemic) times, we enter into our relationships and lean on each other to varying degrees, ebbing and flowing in that way based on who has energy to give, the dynamics of our relationships, how we manage stress, etc. But in these times, everyone is under intense, chronic stress in different ways. Everyone is a pot leaking water, and you are a pot leaking water, too – so if you need to truly be refilled and replenished like never before, you can’t look to another leaking pot. You have to go back to the water source.
